February Resolutions

So I think as can be seen below I wasn't very good with keeping resolutions this month. I did okay with being in touch with far flung friends and family and with teaching, but I slacked on food and exercise and research. I'm actually going to give myself permission to slack on all fronts in March since I move smack dab in the middle of everything. I think getting packed and keeping teaching going in the process will be sufficient things to to do.

Really, I'm using both my resolutions and moving to procrastinate on the other one so I think it's better to focus. Oh I can't deal with packing because I have to work on this data project. Oh I can't deal with this data project because I should be packing. And on and on and on. So since the move is looming and urgent. And since I clearly can't motivate myself to do it all I'm just going to deal with that one for a month.

Work
Teaching
Assignments Card Catalog class
Rework lectures for Epistomology
Research
Collaborative Project
Stats
Analysis #3
Archival Data Project
Assign data analysis to new ugrad
Pilot Data Project
Schedule all subjects - Feb 20
Stats - Feb 28
Data Interpretation - Mar 15
Conf submission - Mar 31
Writing
Theory Article
- Intro
- Review of Theory
- Applied Perspective Patron1- Feb 29
- Applied Perspective Patron2
- Conclusion
Personal
Id exercise location
Daily prayer
Menus & Groceries wk 1
Menus & Groceries wk 2
Menus & Groceries wk 3
Menus & Groceries wk 4
Dishes wk 1
Dishes wk 2
Dishes wk 3
Dishes wk 4
Relationships
letters to 4 2 people
2 1 lunches
Phone call wk 1
Phone call wk 2
Phone call wk 3
Phone call wk 4

Sunday Food

Early in the week I made my own version of shrimp scampi. Thin noodles. Frozen shrimps. Used up 1/2 n 1/2 that was about to turn, a half glass of white wine left in the bottle, snow peas that were in the fridge for who knows what, and green onions. A very tasty way to clean out the fridge.

I also made lemon pepper chicken. The recipe calls for chicken thighs. I used breasts - that was a mistake. It's much much better with thighs. I wish they sold individual flash frozen boneless skinless chicken thighs just like they do chicken breasts. It would make my life so much easier.

I think since I have the whole day to be of the home I am going to make chili (2/3 of which will go to the homeless shelter) and a shrimp-pasta-pea casserole. I think if I make the casserole ahead of time I might be able to come home and pop it in the oven and eat. It has to cook for 30 min or so and I can't get motivated to MAKE it and COOK it all in one night - I'm too hungry when I get home.

This Week's Meals

This week was strange because it was filled with Blizzards and Job Searches. I actually ate out quite a bit and rather sucked at doing the dishes and keeping the kitchen clean once the work week started. On the other hand, other than coffee cups there wasn't much in my dish pile. Nonetheless, the kitchen is spotless now, so I'm starting fresh again.

Saturday: Roast Chicken, Roasted Potatoes, Frozen Veggies
Sunday: Roast Chicken Chimichangas --> Good, but too spicy. Leave out green chilis next time. Quick because of Sat's dinner. I ate/used as leftovers the thighs from a grocery store pre-roasted chicken and frozen vegetables. I used the breast meat from that chicken for this recipe and thus did very little cooking.
Question for the blogosphere: what to do with leftover Queso Fresco?
Monday: Leftovers from Sat & Sun for Lunch and Dinner respectively.
Tuesday: Lunch w/ Candidate; Dinner: Leftovers from Sun.
Wednesday: Lunch: Leftover Apricot Porkchops Dinner: Tomato Soup (from freezer) and Cheese Toast. The tomato soup is EASY and QUICK to make. Doubles well. And freezes well. I make it much more often once I got an immersion blender - much less of a mess than using a real blender to puree hot soup. Usually I make Ham & Cheese Scones to go with it for the fresh batch and then do Cheese toast for reheated rounds.
Thursday: Lunch w/ Candidate; Dinner from local coop - Palak Paneer & Curried Squash. My favorite meal from their deli and something I haven't figured out how to make on my own yet.
Friday: Lunch - Sandwich from coffee shop located between meeting 1 and meeting 2 (eaten during meeting 2); Dinner: Take & Bake Chicken Artichoke Pizza & Wine & Chocolates.
Saturday: Lunch - Leftover Pizza; Dinner French Toast with Ice Cream and Raspberries and Nuts (Ice Cream was mostly because I didn't have any whip cream).

Hopefully next week will be a little more lowkey and will help me to get back on track. Definately I have to make chili before Sunday. I am not sure what else I might make. Maybe chicken caccatori? Maybe something italian. I have to make a plan tomorrow so I can shop between church and

Jan Goals - Recap

Since it's snowing so hard that I can't make it to the super bowl party I had planned to attend, it seems like a good time to claim for catching up on blogs and self reflection.

I made some progress on Jan. goals - all the teaching preparation ones and one of the writing ones got checked off. The other writing one was too big to be managable so I've broken it into smaller bits. Hopefully I can cross off two smaller bits this month and then the rest will fall into place. Unfortunately the data collection and personal ones lagged a bit. The MS student bailing and lack of clarity on data interpretation for the collaborative project really mean I won't be taking anything to the intimate summer conference in the upper midwest. But I should have tons for the national convention in the fall. Such is life.

I was fantastic at menus and groceries and dishes while classes were on break but not at all good once things started. I made homemade mac & cheese, apricot pork chops, white bean, sausage, & spinach caserole, tilapia with curry sauce, and a winter squash soup. And I also ate stuff in the freezer - chicken cacciatore and raviolis. The tilapia was unexpectedly fantastic; the apricot pork chops I won't be making again - they were dull. I've still been eating well since school started because I had enough stuff in the freezer, but I haven't been restocking it at all. And this last week I drifted amazing close to junk (apple caramel bites from sonic) even though I had stuff for a crock pot meal at home. Hopefully I'm back on top of things this week since I went shopping and have stuff for roast chicken chimichangas, chicken caccatore and tilapia with orange glaze. I wonder if Sunday posts on upcoming/completed meals would be a fun way to keep motivated. I divided this all up into weekly to dos because again, monthly it's easy to loose track of what needs done.

The personal ones happened for the most part - my photo class has begun and I'm being more creative; I've been volunteering semi-weekly with the local homeless shelter; I did better about being in touch with far flung friends. But I think the weekly phone calls/regular letters to someone were the toughest to accomplish and will be the hardest to keep up. It's not that I don't want to connect with these people but our schedules seem not to overlap as much as I'd like.

So I've added in an updated list for feb. And I'm starting the month with a clean slate. Hopefully I can get through most of it. I'm skeptical a bit because we have a search on and feb. is short. But I'll try. And some is better than none.

Self-Discipline

So Bonhoffer is not one to pull any punches. The last two chapters my small group read were about self-discipline (Fasting) and Anxiety. It's too much to think about both right now. But the self-discipline one ties in well with my theme for the year (actually anxiety goes with self-acceptance a bit too nicely to be comfortable....). Anyway, self-discipline. The chapter starts by assuming that we fast. Well, I've never really done that. *squirm*.

But if I look over most of the things I resolved to do they are all easy things that just take focus. Self-discipline. Some of the things I actually know go together easily for me. For instance:
clean kitchen = more likely to cook
exercise time = prayer time
And yet I seem to keep procrastinating both of those. I've done better on the clean kitchen (and the cooking) part. But the exercise and prayer pieces still elude me. In truth neither of these things is so bad once I get started. But I hate getting started. Even for the dishes - as long as no more than 1 coffee cup is in the sink I can stay on top of it. But as soon as I let another dish sit there it becomes a BIG DEAL to do the dishes. And so then I don't. And more accumulate. And then I avoid the kitchen to avoid the mess. Anyway....

School officially starts tomorrow. Which means it's really time for me to settle into a routine for the semester. And it would be good if that routine included exercise. It's been cold (like -10F cold) so walking outside hasn't been an option. I need a plan for exercising indoors (exercise video? gym?). If exercising indoors involves leaving my house I also need a plan for my dog to be let out and exercised as well. I know this is only a 2 month problem or so. But that is a long time to let the exercise thing go, especially since it also impacts my spiritual life. Maybe I should add a stop by the sporting goods store to my list for the day and seek a good 30 minute work out video.

Oh, and in the scheme of keeping/not keeping resolutions - I have a volunteer activity I'm satisfied with until March. Then I'll have to find something new. But my photography class sounds like it's going to be canceled due to low enrollment. Boohoo.

Creativity

So I think I've solved the creativity part of the resolution. I'm going to sign up for a digital photography class at the local rec center. (The pottery class meets the same night that I teach a late class and so just doesn't work, even though it would be more messy fun). I think in both cases the medium appeals to my perfectionist streak. Clay that doesn't look right can be mushed up and put back. Digital photos can be deleted. Either way, you don't have your mistakes around to trouble you. I'm also doing a 365 Project blog. You can email me if you want to follow along (photos are a bit more revealing than writing, so I'd like to keep closer track of who's there).

Self Acceptance/Self Discipline

So I said in the previous post that I think a theme for this year could be acceptance and discipline. I know those two things seem at odds with each other, but I think they actually may go hand in hand.

The acceptance part really refers to things I can't change - things that are in many ways beyond my control: having a meaningful relationship with a man, connecting with people who share many of my interests and who I can truly be intimate with. I know I have some control over those things - I can put myself out there. I can join clubs and online dating sites. But in reality much of that is happenstance. Who else is there? Are they available emotionally and mentally to build a new friendship? Do we see the connection in time to make it grow?

I'd also like to try out accepting that this is what my life will be like for the rest of my life. That I won't ever marry. That I won't have kids. Maybe not having a close family will free me up for more volunteer work or more opportunities to travel and go and do things that have an impact on the world. I'd like to try to find ways to make those connections. It would be simpler all around to truly accept my circumstances and move on to the other opportunities available to me. On the other hand, maybe not having a family will just seem to lonely to me. If that's the case, then I'd like to start exploring things like the emotional commitment, time management and finances involved in having a child on my own - big brothers big sisters, being a foster parent, medical options for being pregnant....

The discipline part refers to things I can change - personal habits if you will. Exercise. Eating well. Being engaged in my community. Having better work habits. I've been good about all of these things in the past but really I've let them slide. I'd like to improve those things. I believe I can. I also think the process of documenting monthly goals and accomplishments ala Science Woman will be good for me.

So January Goals:

• Work
• Course Prep - complete syllabus, revamp lectures from (weak) 3rd topic in course, plan a compelling first day agenda
• Conference Submissions (3) - meet with student to complete analysis, do my part for collaborative work with colleague, schedule subjects
• Writing - try to write a serious theory paper out of grant introduction

• Personal
  
• Identify a place to volunteer at least 2 hrs/week
  
• Decide on and sign up for an art class - photo or pottery
• Arrange for doggy daycare so that I can do more serious exercise guilt free. Sign up for a class that builds core muscles (pilates? yoga?).
  
• Set aside time each day for prayer and self-reflection
• Plan menus and grocery shop so that I have what I need to cook at least 3 meals at home per week.
  
• Stay on top of dishes so that my kitchen is welcoming and not overwhelming.
  

• Relationship
• Write emails or letters to at least 4 friends who live far away
• Invite two people who I'd like to know better to lunch
• Call one family member per week other than my parents
  

So that list seems overwhelming, but I actually know that I am capable of all of that - especially since I don't start teaching for three weeks. And I also know that once I work that into my life, it won't be hard to maintain it, although it might slow down my consumption of 6 feet under DVDs. We'll see how I do at that in Feb.

New Year's Meme

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Successfully rolled a kayak. Submitted data from a project that was developed completely independently to a journal. Organized two conferences.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't really make resolutions in 2007. I think I'd like to this year, but I'm working on what they should be. I think I need some theme ala profgrrrrl either about self-discipline or self-acceptance. Those may go a bit hand in hand. Seriously though, I'd like to

1. Exercise regularly. Not only walking but something that actually builds muscles and strength and coordination. (Practical strategy - take a class. Join a gym. Schedule a time not in the morning to do this).
   
2. Be more self-reflective (Practicaly strategy - this blog)
3. Pray regularly (Practical strategy - this could go well with 1, since exercise time often doesn't engage my brain, which is part of why I avoid it.)
4. Volunteer somewhere where I am in direct contact with the people I am serving (Practical Strategy - call the crisis center and free medical clinic next week).
   
5. Use my work time more productively so that I can play more (not sure how to strategize this one, except to avoid reading blogs and the news during work hours).
   
6. Develop my artistic side (Practical strategy - take a class in digital photography, pottery, and/or cooking).
   

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My Sister

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My Grandpa

5. What countries did you visit?
None actually... But a new state (Maryland). I did travel a lot - just not outside the US.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
A serious relationship.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Aug 6.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting my first article from new data out.
Learning to conquer panic underwater (kayak rolls).

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not getting my grant funded (but it was scored, so that's not so bad). I'm not sure that there's anything this year that I'd count as a true failure.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A new calendar. I know that sounds lame, but I really love the planner I started using last year. And maybe a new digital camera. But I still need to learn how to use it better to be sure.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My master's students

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
A good friend who started dating and essentially ditched me.
My dad, who doesn't seem to be taking very good care of himself lately.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Travel for conferences. Take Out since I was too lazy to cook.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Submitting to a conference in Europe. Meeting a researcher who is really influencing where my work is going. Meeting my new nephew.

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
I suck at musical things....and can't ever remember song titles.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
a) the same overall, perhaps happier because there's less family drama and stress b) fatter c)
richer (but this will change rapidly if I buy a house).

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercised. Been self-reflective. Stayed in touch with friends.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Sleeping. TV watching (netflix is bad for feeding this habit).

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
With Family

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?
Unfortunately, no.

22. How many one-night stands?
None.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
6 Feet Under. I know I'm behind the times, but I can't wait for the next DVD to arrive and it irritates me that only 2 episodes are on each DVD. A bit morbid, but good relationship writing.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No, if anything I have a better relationship (or at least perspective) on several people who irritated me at this time last year.

25. What was the best book you read?
Not sure - Maybe What is the What by Dave Eggers. Maybe HarpSong by Rilla Askew.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Hmm. My Brother In Law's music collection?

27. What did you want and get?
A repaired friendship.

28. What did you want and not get?
A grant.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Jouyeux Noel. Good enough that it prompted me to tell people about it anyway. But see my answer to 35.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 30 and spent the day in a low key way with friends.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A serious relationship. More self-discipline. A grant.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
Uhm?

33. What kept you sane?
Probably my netflix subscription... Although I think I should give that up and get out more.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't know. I guess maybe the Democratic Presidential Candidates. But that might be who has fascinated me the most - who I've spent the most time studying. I think the lead in 6 feet under is hot, but I don't know if that counts.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I think the conflicts in Africa actually. I'm trying to figure out a way to get involved. But I've read two books (What is the What, A country in my Skull) and watched several movies (In my Country, Syriana, Hotel Rwanda, The Constant Gardener, Blood Diamond, Tsotsi) and been in conversation with a friend in the peace corps. All of which have convinced me that this is an area of the world in desperate straits, mostly brought about by our desire for oil and left over messes from colonialism. I'd like to do more than write a check, but I'm not quite sure what to do yet.

I'm also following the presidential election pretty closely. I have some decisions to make soon on that front and I'm still very puzzled about what I want.

36. Who did you miss?
My granddad. My new nephew. My best friend. It seems that most of the important people live far from me.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Hmmm a friend who is now gone, but will return next year.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
I learned, again, that I can be alone most of the time, even if it isn't my favorite thing. And that it's up to me to change that alone-ness into relationships.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
See 16.